During a war sardar’s assistant replied
assit: “Sir, we are surrounded by enemies….”
Sardar: “Good so we can shoot in any direction…”
One day sardar was crying… friend asked to him..
friend: “Sardar why r u crying??”
sardar: “My mom died..”
After some time he started crying even louder…
friend: “Why r u crying now???”
Sardar: “My sister phoned to me and told that her mom also died…”
One day sardar was resting on the park… One men came and asked to him…
Man1: “R u relaxing???”
Sardar: “No, i am Ramsing…”
After some time other man came and asked…
Man2: “R u relaxing???”
Sardar: “No, i am Ramsing…”
Angry Sardar went away…. Then asked to another person….
Saradr: “R u relaxing???”
Man: “Ya, i am relaxing…”
Sardar gave him a slap and told to him
Saradr: “Everyone is looking for u… and u are sitting here.
Teacher asked Sardar : “can a person have name & surname same ?”
Sardar replied : “YES”, If Lara Dutta marries Brian Lara, her name
will be Lara Lara.”
One day an interviewer asked to Saradar
Interviewer: “Imagine that u r in the fourth floor of a building and it suddenly caught fire… What will u do????”
Sardar: “I will stop my imagination…”
How do you keep a Sardar whole day busy?
Take him to a Circular Room and ask him to sit in a Corner!!!
Shayari by Sardar:
Khidki se dekha to raaste pe koi nahi tha,
Khidki se dekha to raaste pe koi nahi tha,
Raaste pe jaa ke dekha to khidki pe koi nahi tha!!!
A sardar went to a shop to buy a National Flag for 26 Jan.
Then he asked the shopkeeper something which drived da shopkeeper crazy…..Guess wat??
Isme aur colour dikhao!!!
Teacher to Sardar: Write your best friend’s name in English. Sardar wrote: ‘ Beautiful Red Underware’ Teacher: What? Sardar: His name is Sundar Lal Chaddi
After returning back from a foreign trip, sardar asked his wife, Do I look like a foreigner? Wife: No! Why? Sardar: In London a lady asked me Are you a foreigner?
One tourist from U.S.A. asked to Sardar: Any great man born in this village??? Sardar: no sir, only small Babies!!!
Sardar ji Aapko logo ne kyun mara ? Sardar ” yaar Meri Photo Bas main Gir Gayi To Maine Madam Se Kaha Zara Sadi Upar Karo Photo Lena Hai
Police-tumhe kal subah 5 baje fandsi de jayegi……..
santa- HA HA HA Ha HA………….
Police- kyon hans rahe ho?
Santa-mein to subah 8 baje se pehle uthta hi nahi hu…………
| AIK SARDAR ROAD PER PESHAB KER RAHA THA
EIK ANGRAIZ NAI POCHA YAHAN POLICE NAHIN PAKERTI
SARDAR NAI JAWAB DIA, NAHIN SAHAB YAHAN KHUD PAKARNA PERHTA HAI
Interviewer- Y did u leave ur last job?
Sardar- Coz, d company shiftedits office and didnt tell me where….
Do you know why Sardar bought a brown cow???
A: To get chocalate milk………
when sardar experimenting a cockroach, he cut 1 of itz legz and told to walk. The cockroach began moving slowly. He continued thiz until all legz were cut out. Then he told it to walk, but it didnt move. So he wrote the interference:
“If all the legz of a cockroach were cut, it lozez itz ability to hear”
A dog was chasing a Sardar and the Sardar was laughing.
A bystander: why are u laughing?
Sardar: I have a Airtel cell phone but still hutch network is
Sardar to his servant: Go and water the plants.
Servant: It”s already raining.
Sardar: So what take an umbrella and go.
Sardar purposing a girl:darling kya tum mjhe se shadii karo gi?
girl:tameez se baat karo.
Sardar:behan jee,kya aap mjhe se shaadi karain gi?
Santa was drawing money from ATM. Banta, who was just behind him in the line said: I’ve seen ur password. It’s ****. Santa: U r wrong. It’s 1394.
Santa falls in love with a nurse… After much thinking, he finally writes a love letter to her: “I luv u sister.”
A lady calls Santa for repairing door bell.
Santa doesn’t turns up for 4 days.
Lady calls again, Santa replies: I’m coming daily since 4 days, I press the bell but no one comes out.
Santa and Banta went for a drive.
Santa: Hey, look out from the window, are the indicators working or not?
Banta puts his head out & says “Yes-No, Yes-No, Yes-No, Yes-No!!!”
Why did santa keep the door open while bathing?
Because he was afraid that someone might watch him from the key hole.
Santa: I kiss my wife everyday before leaving for office, what about u?
Banta: Me too, after u leave.
Santa: I’m a proud father. My son is in medical college.
Banta: What’s he studying?”
Santa: He’s not studying, they are studying him!
Banta: Name the 3 fastest means of communication.
Santa: Telephone, Television, Tell-a-woman.
Santa standing on platform suddenly jumps on the railway track.
Banta: Santa u’ll die.
Santa: U’ll die bcoz haven’t u heard train is coming on platform
Santa walks into a library & says, “Can I have a burger and coke?” Librarian, “I’m sorry, this is a library.” Santa whispers, “Can I have a burger & fries?”
Santa: Ghar ka saara keemti samaan chhupa ke rakh do, mere dost aa rahe hain.
Jeeto: Kyon! Aapke dost chura lengey?
Santa: Nahin, pehchan lengey.
A sardar asked his frend,
“kya tumharay underwear mein suraakh hain?”
Frend replied “No”
“tou phir taangain kahan sey daalta hai saalay…”
Hitler to Sardarji: Impossible ka word meri dictionery main nahin hai.
Sardarji: Te Ullo ke pathay dictionery dekh k kharidni thi na…!
2sardar jungle me,Samne sher a gya 1 ne mitti uthai sher ki ankh me dal k bhagne lga.2nd wahen khara rha
2nd: me q bhagon,mitti tone dali hai..
A man to a Sardar: Ur friend is kissing ur wife in ur home.
Sardar rushes home and came back within half an hour n slapped the man n said: He’s not my friend..
Sardarji calls Air India. “How long does it take to fly to Amritsar?”
“Just a sec,” says the receptionist. “Thank you.” says the Sardar and
Sardarji was getting bitten by mosquitoes the whole night.he got irritated….
drank poison and said ab kaato saloon sab ke sab maroge…
Sardar se kisi ny kaha
flag may tmhara kia hy
Sardar thught n rplied
OYE .. !
DANDA TERE PIYO DA AY!
SARDAR :: Beta ye kaisi machis lay kar aaye ho ek bhi nahi jal rahi??
SON :: kya baat kartay ho pappa sub check kar kay laya hoooon…
DEATHS THAT MADE EVEN TOP DOCTORS WONDER…
This case happened in a hospital’s Intensive care ward where Patients always died in the same bed and on all Sunday morning at 11a.m, regardless of their medical condition.
This puzzled the doctors and some even thought that it had something to dowith the supernatural. No one could solve the mystery as to why the deaths took place at 11 AM.So a world-wide expert team was constituted and they decided to go down to the ward to investigate the cause of the incidents. So on the next Sunday morning few minutes before 11 a.m. all doctors and nurses nervously waited outside the ward to see for themselves what the terrible
phenomenon was all about. Some were holding wooden crosses, prayer books and other holy objects to ward off evil……..
Just when the! clock struck 11… and
Santa Singh, the part-time Sunday sweeper, entered the ward and
Unplugged the life machines n plug the vacume cleaner
Sadar to Thelewallah: yeh kele kaise diye?
Thelewallah : Ek rupay ka
Sardar: 60 p mein dega?
Thelewallah : 60p mein to sirf chilka aayega.
sardar : Oye! Chal ye leh 40 paise, chilka rakh, kela de de!!
Santa kissed his girl friend in the park. Girl: Plz ye sb shadi se pehle…
Santa: Don’t worry darling, I’m already married.
Santa: Main aur meri girlfriend shaadi kar rahe hain.
Banta: Wow, Kab?
Santa: Meri 7 Dec ko aur uski 13 Jan ko.
Sardar bought some medicenes and started cutting the edges.
“What are you doing?”, asked his friend.
The Sardar replied,”Removing the side effects !”
Aik Sardar apne bete se bola: hun to exam wich 80% number lene ne!
Bete ne jawab dia: Fikar na kar bapo! 100% aan ge!
Sardar bola: O Kajra mazaq karna!!!!?
Bete ne jawab dia: Mazaq shuro kis kanjar ne kita c??
Sardar: I hav’nt slept all nite in the
Sardar: Got upper berth.
Friend: Y didn’t u Xchnge?
Sardar: oye, there was nobody 2 Xchnge in the lower Berth..
A sardharji photographer focusing
a dead body’s face in a funeral function, suddenly all relatives
beat him why? He said “SMILE PLEASE”